From partners to parents
The transition from being partners to becoming parents can feel really challenging. It’s normal to experience relationship stress during the transition to parenthood. You may find your usual styles of communicating and supporting each other don’t work as well as they used to. It takes time and commitment from both partners when you’re adjusting to life as parents.
“I found it difficult to understand what she did need. Often it was just to be listened to.”
Helpful Information
Managing relationships: guide for dads
Reconnecting with your partner after baby comes home
Welcoming a baby into your family can provide opportunities to bond with your partner in new ways as you share the highs and lows of parenthood.
1
Schedule time to have important discussions.
2
Carve out some alone time.
3
Have an occasional ‘date night’.
4
Find new ways to connect and be affectionate in a non-sexual way.
5
Keep talking to each other.
6
Be your partner's biggest champion.
Positive approaches to communication with your partner
1
Practice empathy and understanding.
2
Be open and honest and encourage your partner to do the same.
3
Help each other to problem solve.
4
Agree on a mutual balance of essential tasks
5
Be gentle and kind to each other.
6
Sometimes you and your partner may have conflicting needs.
7
Take breaks from each other.
8
Build your community of care.
9
Be on the same page when it comes to caring for your baby.
10
Seek help.
11
Work with your partner as a team.
Helpful communication techniques during discussions
1
Timing is everything
2
Use "I" statements
3
Communicate what you really need, and hope for
4
Active listening
5
Talk to each other with kindness, respect and compassion.
6
Remember that all viewpoints are valid
7
Focus the conversation on the problem, not the person
8
If there’s conflict or tempers flare
Relationship support services
If you would like to find ways to improve your communication skills with your partner and strengthen your relationship, consider contacting the organisations listed below:
- Call Relationships Australia in your state or territory on 1300 364 277
- Call Family Relationships Online on 1800 050 321
- Call Lifeline on 131 114
- Call Mensline on 1300 789 978
- Call 1800RESPECT on 1800 737 732
Or visit your doctor to talk things through and get a referral to a psychologist or relationship or family counselling service.
Owen's story: Managing communication challenges
"One of the biggest challenges for me during the perinatal period was communicating with my wife."
Articles
PANDA National Helpline
Find someone to talk to, Monday to Saturday.
1300 726 306
Call 000 for police and ambulance if you or someone else are in immediate danger
Talk with friends or family
Consider talking about how you are feeling with someone you trust. This might be a friend or family member. Once you starting talking you might be surprised at how many others have had similar experiences and the support they can provide you.
Talk with your doctor
Talking with your doctor can be an important step to getting the help you need. They should be able to give you non-judgemental support, assessment, diagnosis, and ongoing care and treatment. They can also refer you to specialists such as a counsellor, psychologist or psychiatrist.
Get help now
If you are having suicidal thoughts or are feeling disorientated it’s important to get help immediately. PANDA is not a crisis service, if you need immediate support call Lifeline 13 11 14 (24/7).